Sunday, November 23, 2008

I've been keeping a secret....

I must confess a secret. There hasn't been many moments since June that I've been confident in this pregnancy. Ever since getting news that there could be a problem, I've held my breath. Every time a test comes and goes a part of me won't let go of the worry.
Now another hurdle? I know that it isn't super uncommon for a baby to be breech, but there are studies that show there could be potential neurological problems associated with breech babies; that worries me. Could this be why my initial tests came back problematic? (A question that is nagging at me.)
I didn't realize how I've suppressed my worry since our last tests came back favorable, but apparently, they're still hiding within. Maybe that is why I have been trying everything so aggressively to make this baby turn, but with every day that passes...it gets harder. I just need to know that this baby is OK, and the only way to do that is to have him/her here.
I am praying in these last weeks that God restores His peace within me, and that our baby will be born (with out surgery) healthy, healthy, healthy.... if you can join me, please do!

3 comments:

Lindsey said...

i'm praying :-)

Danielle said...

Kelli, let me first say, you look so cute! I've been reading your posts on google reader and so haven't seen your whole layout, but I love your picture. Secondly, let me say, c-sections aren't really all that terrible. The way I see it, it's going to hurt one place or another - both hurt a lot, but your body WILL heal. Not only that, but if you do end up having a c-section, you'll be awake and calm and capable of taking in the gravity of the moment this little one enters the world. I've never had a natural birth, but the second time around with a planned c-section, I was actually able to enjoy the experience. Life entering the world -one way or another- is a beautiful thing, especially when this little one will have a Mommy and Daddy who have anticipated and dreamed of this little one for many months.

~Praying Through Life~ said...

Danielle, I agree. I'm more concerned over there being a problem w/ the baby rather than the actual c-section itself. Not that I'd be super excited about having one (or REALLY more the recovery aspect)...but if I had to do it; I'd do it....My main concern is the health of the baby, and why we've been having issues up to this point...
Thanks for taking the time to write me about your experience. It is nice to know someone who's been through it=)